Her Boyfriend Expects Her To Pay Rent On An Apartment He Bought With His Inheritance As An Insurance Policy In Case They Break Up
For two years so far, this 22-year-old girl and her 26-year-old boyfriend have been together. She’s about to graduate from college, and they have already decided to move in with one another afterward.
Her boyfriend has told her all along that he would not make her pay rent once they are living under one roof. Her boyfriend inherited a good sum of money, and then he bought his apartment for cash with his inheritance, so he does not have a mortgage.
In their prior discussions, they came to the agreement that they would split their bills down the middle, and that would be her only financial expectation.
Approximately three months from now, she’s set to move into her boyfriend’s apartment, but a few weeks back, he threw her a curveball.
“Two weeks ago, he brought up the fact that he had lunch with his sister and she told him that he should be charging me for rent when I moved in, as ‘security in case we break up – as he could be making money having a roommate if I didn’t live with him,’” she explained.
“So he told me about this and I was a little taken aback as he repeatedly told me he’d never ask that of me, and his reasoning as to why he wanted the money seemed as though he didn’t trust in our shared future.”
“Even if that was the case, I don’t think he should have mentioned that part to me (something no one wants to hear). But overall I did understand and I felt alright about it after a few days, and also because the amount he asked me [for] was completely reasonable.”
A few days ago they had a date night together, and her boyfriend dragged up rent once again.
He stated he needed her to give him more money than what they had talked about, and when she questioned him about the amount, he responded it had to be double.
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She started to choke up, as she struggles with confrontational conversations, but she was able to express to him that she believes they should decide on where her rent money will go.
One idea she had is that they can set the money aside and that can be used for something that benefits them both in the future.
She added that she feels uneasy about the reason behind him suddenly wanting her to pay him rent. He did say sorry, but mentioned what she will be paying him is far beneath the going rate on a rental she could get alone.
“Although I obviously know this, I also feel uncomfortable knowing that his place that we are moving into isn’t as though he’s paying a mortgage or even “worked” to get the money to buy it in the first place. It just feels weird to give him money when he doesn’t have more bills than me to pay,” she added.
“Anyway, I tried to explain this to him and he kept saying that I will have saved a lot of money if we were to ever break up. But also if we do break up, I would have saved money, and he would have made money, off of me!”
Should their relationship end, he won’t have to find somewhere new to live, but she will, so that will require a good chunk of change for rent and a deposit.
As for her boyfriend, it would be easy for him to get a roommate and continue to make money on the place he already owns.
Adding to this, she has to pay for another visa to keep staying in the country, and that will be an enormous expense for her.
“Anyway, the whole thing is making me feel super weird and I don’t know how to approach the subject anymore,” she continued.
“Am I being unfair? Again, I don’t mind paying him rent, but more so as to what happens with that money is my concern.”
What advice do you have for her?
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