His Wife Publicly Mocks And Embarrasses Him Over The Trauma He Suffers As A First Responder
I have an immense amount of respect for first responders, and it’s a job I know I wouldn’t be mentally tough enough to handle.
This 39-year-old man works as a first responder, and he says that the stuff he’s witnessed on the job are experiences he would not wish on his worst enemy.
He sees people in the most awful times in their lives. He sees dying. He sees suffering. He sees it all, and it’s hard to deal with.
He tries not to take the baggage of his job home with him at the end of the day, though some evenings, it certainly haunts him, and he’s not able to build that barricade.
His 34-year-old wife is someone he looks to in order to help him deal with all of the heartbreaking things he sees, but instead of being supportive, she’s making it all harder on him.
Now, he was a first responder when he met his wife, so she knew what she was signing up for. In lieu of being a shoulder for him to lean on, his wife takes everything traumatic and turns it into cruel jokes at his expense.
“She tells people I “act tough at work but can’t handle real life.” She’s mocked me for breaking down after particularly bad calls, telling her friends how I “whined like a baby” after losing a patient,” he explained.
“If I wake up from a nightmare, she laughs it off in the morning, saying she “married a hero, not a coward.” She’s even told people personal things I’ve confided in her…things I struggle with, the worst calls I’ve had, like it’s entertainment.”
“I overheard her at a dinner party telling a story about how I froze up for a second after a distressing call. She turned it into some exaggerated joke when, in reality, I was just processing something horrific.”
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This upsets and stresses him. He’s attempted to tell his wife how hurtful she’s being, but she waves him away and accuses him of being overly full of emotions. When he does stand up to his wife, she just insults him.
He mentioned to his wife that he would like to explore counseling with her, as that’s how hurt he feels by her public embarrassment, but she responded that therapy is for marriages that are already ruined.
She then said he was being a drama queen. He does not feel alright, though. He feels lonely, he feels worthless, and he feels like he’s giving all of himself to his job.
“I don’t expect her to understand what I go through, but I at least expected respect, loyalty, and basic human decency,” he continued.
“I make lots of time for our marriage and relationship. I will always swap a shift if she wants to do something or we have a family obligation, and I try all I can to make her the priority.”
“It is also increasingly hard to find time to myself. I’ve been big into fitness our whole relationship, and daily gym sessions are a massive source of therapy for me, but even these are now being raised by her as some kind of joke. “You will never have the body you had at 25,” etc. FTR, I look pretty…great for 39!”
He’s left wondering how he can deal with his wife and when he should decide to give up on her and their marriage.
What do you think?
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