This man and his wife got divorced a couple of years back when he learned that she was conducting an emotional affair.
He was the one who moved ahead with the divorce, and he never shared with his daughter the reason why they split up.
He was worried that if he told her the truth, it would negatively impact the relationship with her mom, his now ex-wife.
But in trying to save his daughter’s bond with his ex-wife, he hurt his own relationship with his daughter in the process.
“All my daughter knew was I initiated the divorce and that her mom tried really hard to save the marriage,” he explained.
“So my daughter was expectedly really angry with me. However, what really hurt me was when she did not want me to attend her college graduation.”
“I was really proud of what she had accomplished, and I was really looking forward to her graduation and her name being called. But when she told me on the call that she didn’t want me to come, I took it really hard.”
Several months later, his daughter called him up in tears and said sorry. She revealed that his ex-wife finally told her why they got divorced.
His ex-wife had felt guilty enough after he was uninvited from his daughter’s graduation ceremony, and that caused her to come forward.
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He did accept the apology his daughter offered up, but it still hurt him greatly that he was prevented from seeing her graduate.
Three years have gone by since that phone call, and a week ago, he got married again in a tiny, private celebration.
He invited his closest friends and family members, as he wasn’t interested in his wedding being an over-the-top event.
“I debated inviting my daughter to the wedding, but I realized I still had some lingering resentment, and I didn’t want her at the wedding,” he added.
“The wedding overall was great, and I did the father-daughter dance with my niece. Last night, my daughter called me. She was really hurt because I did not tell her I had even married, and she found about it from some Facebook pics and videos.”
“She was also upfront with me and told me what hurt her most was seeing the video of the father-daughter dance with my niece. I felt guilty about it because she was crying a lot on the call. I told her it was just that my niece is close to both me and my wife (my wife is my sister’s best friend). I told her it wasn’t a slight against her at all.”
His daughter questioned him about whether he had declined to invite her after she hadn’t let him come to her graduation, even though it was years ago.
He admitted to his daughter that it was true – he still resents her for that, and it’s not something he’s left in the past.
He said that it was his wedding day, so he was free to make sure only the people he felt the best around should be there with him.
He’s left wondering if it was wrong to exclude his daughter from his wedding. What do you think?
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