Her Fiancé’s Mom Expects Her To Cancel Her Wedding So She Has The Cash To Attend A Destination Wedding For Her Fiancé’s Brother
This 25-year-old woman got engaged to her 28-year-old fiancé, M, back in June after dating for the last five years.
M spent more than a year planning out the perfect proposal for her, and they’re excited to work out the details of their wedding.
One week after she got engaged, M’s younger brother, S, got engaged to his girlfriend while on vacation in Italy.
It seemed the couple was going to have a hometown wedding, but then they decided against it and picked a destination wedding located in Italy.
“This caught M and I and his parents off guard since we are all fairly poor,” she explained. “We have been open and honest that our wedding budget is $10K, whereas they said they didn’t have a budget they were going to do what they want and worry about money later.”
“At first, we said we didn’t know if we can afford Italy, so they gave out the save the dates and didn’t bother to give us one.”
“After M told S that that was kind of hurtful since we said we couldn’t commit without more information and the save the date had the wedding website link, he made us one.”
Upon receiving more information about the wedding, S said that the destination wedding would cost them approximately $5,000 to attend.
That only includes the plane tickets, the accommodations, and food. That does not factor in the cost of purchasing luggage, getting their passports, and buying wedding-appropriate outfits.
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She and M have never been able to come up with the money to go on vacation, and they don’t have money left over after paying all of their bills every month.
The only reason they have a $10,000 nest egg for their own wedding is because she saved up before she even met M for her dream wedding.
Throughout the last two months, she and M have been fretting about what they should do. They know it will probably cost them $7,000 all in to go to S’s wedding.
This means they will no longer have the cash to pay for their own wedding or honeymoon. Yesterday, they called up S to admit that they can’t attend the destination wedding without financial assistance.
S pointed out that he and his bride-to-be already promised one another that they would not spend any of their own money helping guests get to Italy. S then stated he feels upset that M won’t be at the wedding, as he asked him to be the Best Man.
After hanging up with S, they called up M and S’s mom to fill her in, and what her mother-in-law had to say was wild.
“She thinks family is the most important thing in the world, and if we have to cancel our wedding and honeymoon to go to Italy, we should,” she added.
“She herself is going to have to take money out of retirement to go, and she is pretty poor as it is. We just can’t believe that after all of this, we are the bad guys to his family. And once we finally do have our wedding and honeymoon, we’re going to get a ton of [grief] for it, and if we had money for that, why couldn’t we do Italy, etc.”
“To be clear, I 100% support that a wedding should be the bride and groom’s choice when it comes to location and invitations and logistics. I don’t think we are owed anything. Just crazy to us that they want this wedding in a location that they know their family can’t afford to go to, but also want their family there really bad and aren’t willing to help financially at all.”
What do you think she should do?
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