The following column is the opinion and analysis of the writer. As an avid gym-goer, I can attest to the many unspoken rules about gym etiquette. Some examples include:
- Please do not stare at people while they’re doing their thing
- Put your weights away when you are done with them
- Wipe down benches when you are finished with them
- Do not hoard all the free weights during peak hours
- If someone is trying to record their workout, try to avoid walking in front of the camera
- Finally, don’t be the guy yelling and dropping weights unless it is in a designated spot where that is acceptable
However, one significant rule – especially for men – is not to try to pick up women at the gym. This rule is taught early on to avoid men coming off as creepy and to allow women to feel comfortable in the gym environment.
So here lies the problem: if the gym is the best place to pick up a fellow fitness fanatic, how do you get around this rule of not hitting on women at the gym? Well, fear not. There is a way to hit on a woman without being a creep.
It all comes down to the context in which you attempt to shoot your shot, gentlemen. So, to give you the best chance possible in successfully getting a date with the fitness bunny you’ve had a crush on forever, here are five tips to avoid becoming a creep.
Tip #1: Check Her Body Language Before You Approach Her
The last thing you want to do is walk up to a gym chick who has zero interest in talking to you. If she wants to be approached, she will likely give you some signal. Examples of signs that say she is okay with being approached include:
- She makes eye contact more than once
- She smiles at you
- She moves closer to your station
If she refuses to meet your gaze, does not smile if you make eye contact, and avoids getting too close to where you are working out, she is not interested in treating the gym like a dating pool – so move on.
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Tip #2: Do Not Interrupt Her Set
If you feel positive that she has given you a non-verbal green light to approach her, ensure you don’t interrupt her workout.
Instead, either talk to her between sets or as she wraps up her session. The gym is primarily about working out, so let her get her workout done before you shoot your shot with the gym baddie.
Tip #3: No Matter How Hot She Is, Do Not Compliment Her Body
If she is in great shape and attractive, countless dudes have probably told her that she looks good. If you want to have half a shot with her, you cannot go for the apparent compliment of her physique. Instead, compliment something she likely isn’t going to expect.
Examples of better compliments would be:
- Her form on a specific exercise (try not to compliment squats or deadlifts)
- Her outfit if it’s color-coordinated
- Her kicks, if she’s got cool shoes
- Her overall athletic performance
Get creative here and make sure it’s uniquely you. Be funny and original – that way, she is charmed and not creeped out.
Tip #4: Do Not Ask Her Out Immediately
If this is your first interaction with her, do not ask her out yet – even if this interaction went well. Instead, take some time to talk with her more before you ask her out. If you are both gym rats, chances are you’ll see her there again soon, anyway.
Tip #5: Do Not Stalk Her On Social Media Before You’ve Had Any Real Interaction
Do not look up the gym baddie on IG, TikTok, Facebook, or any other social media, and try to initiate anything there before you’ve ever talked to her in person.
Nothing will creep her out more than seeing you at the gym and realizing you are the creepy guy who liked 25 pictures on IG back-to-back randomly.
Also, I have a cheat hack to help you out. Gyms are full of mirrors. Try to pick a spot to work out where you can see her in the mirror through your peripherals.
This lets you know if she checks you out while you’re doing your workout. If so, she at least likes looking at you, and that’s a start.