His Wife Spent 17 Years Hating Their Special Needs Son, And He’s Finally Considering A Divorce
Back when this 47-year-old man’s 45-year-old wife was pregnant, they found out that their baby could potentially have Down syndrome.
His wife was thrilled about her pregnancy, but that evaporated along with the news. As soon as his wife gave birth to their son, the midwives could tell that he unquestionably had Down syndrome.
From that moment on, his wife developed a deep-seated hatred for their son. They saw specialists and doctors who were convinced his wife was suffering from postpartum depression. All their loved ones believed his wife was struggling and would improve in time.
“I know I’m not the most educated when it comes to mental health and whatnot, but I can see hatred when it’s in front of me, and she absolutely hated our son,” he explained.
“The pure looks of disgust I’ve seen from her while she looks at our son left a permanent stain in my head. I loved him regardless, and I tried to be understanding of her at first. I tried to make excuses and reasons for her reaction and her behavior.”
“I took it all on the chin, and deep down, I knew she felt awful and guilty, I continued my full-time job while also taking care of our son completely on my own (she wouldn’t even acknowledge him at times), and taking my wife to therapists and psychiatrists quietly because she “didn’t want anyone to know.”
Sometimes, he had no other option but to leave his son with his wife all alone, and then he began having panic attacks.
One day, his son made a family picture of them all, and his wife was the only one his son drew with a face that had no smile.
His wife broke down, and that moment made him realize the woman he loved was in there. He knew he had to forge ahead and stay strong for his wife.
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If he had given up on his wife back then, she would have gone out of her mind. To him, how upset she was over that drawing was proof his wife could learn to love their son. She simply needed more time.
So, he painted a smile on his face and played along that everything was good. His wife slowly yet surely did get her act together.
They did grow into that family he wanted. He no longer had to fake it. His life could go back to normal. He was filled with joy, but that all came to a screeching halt when he stopped to think about how his wife has spent the last 17 years treating their son like he’s not a human being; like he’s less than.
“I was going through this in my head all day, all night for the past week when finally I came to the conclusion that this is just my life, I don’t have anyone to rely on, I have no clue who my wife is, I spent 17 years of my life picking up after a 17-year hiatus from parenting and the world that my wife took, and picking up after our special needs son,” he added.
“I never gave myself the chance to think about things, and last night, I cried. I spent 17 years doing this alone, and I know it sounds awful to say, but it [makes me mad that] she gets to enjoy our son now and is choosing to be happy now that we are financially free and are living our best lives.”
“I know that I love my wife, and I know that she was going through a lot, but 17 years I spent being there for her, and not even once did she thank me or ask how I was doing or anything. It was all about her at times- her or my son. I feel like at this point, I don’t even want to reopen any old wounds in fear that she might go back into whatever state she was in before. So, at this moment, all I can think about is divorce.”
He’s trying hard to show his wife sympathy since she did suffer in her own way, but as every day goes on, he is increasingly filled with anger.
Do you think he should divorce his wife or keep trying?
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