Her Boyfriend Proposed To Her Publicly, So She Accepted, Yet Declined When They Were Alone
Public proposals can turn into sticky situations, especially when the person you’re proposing to isn’t sure that saying yes is the best thing for them.
For the last three years, this 26-year-old woman has been dating her 28-year-old boyfriend, and their relationship is great, though she’s expressed to him she is not at a point in her life where she feels prepared to get married.
She has outright said to her boyfriend that she needs a lot more time and space to feel like she is able to make such a commitment to him.
Also, there are a few more things causing her to hesitate: her boyfriend doesn’t have a steady career and she would like him to have more money to his name prior to marrying him and considering starting a family then.
Additionally, her parents are not the biggest fans of her boyfriend, and she knows they will be down to lecture her on making sure she doesn’t marry him, since they feel she will regret it later if she does try to take the next step with him.
A couple of weeks ago, she and her boyfriend attended a large party organized for his dad’s 60th birthday.
“I noticed that he was acting a little nervous but didn’t think much of it. Then, during the event, he got everyone’s attention, got down on one knee, and proposed to me in front of all his friends and family. I was completely caught off guard and panicked,” she explained.
“Now, I’ve heard stories about how rejecting someone in public can humiliate them, and I really didn’t want to do that to him, especially in front of everyone he cares about.”
“So, I said yes in the moment. Everyone cheered, and he looked so happy. I felt horrible for misleading him, but I didn’t know what else to do.”
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She felt terribly confused, as her boyfriend has never told her that getting married is important to him, and she never expected him to propose to her.
When the party was over and they were alone driving back home, she admitted that she does love him, but she’s not able to marry him quite yet.
She then said she only agreed to accept his proposal to save him the humiliation. She truly believed that telling him the truth when they were alone was the right thing.
“He got really upset and said I’d humiliated him even more because now he has to go back and tell everyone that we’re not actually engaged,” she added.
“He said I should’ve just said no at the party if that’s how I felt. I feel terrible that I’ve hurt him and put him in this position, but I also feel like he put me on the spot in front of everyone without considering my feelings.”
“We’ve yet to tell his family or anyone, and they keep calling and texting to give their congrats, which is upsetting him even more, and I’m seeing videos his friends posted online of him getting on one knee, so it’s pretty public now.”
She’s left wondering if it was wrong of her to say yes to not make him feel bad in front of a crowd.
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