While it’s easy to believe that dating is better when you’re considered conventionally attractive, this 29-year-old woman says that’s not been her experience.
She’s spent over four years being single now, even though she’s gorgeous. Strangers come up to her when she’s walking down the street all the time to tell her about how beautiful she is.
Despite that, dating has been nearly impossible for her. She’s not sharing her experience to make you pity her – she’s just telling you what it’s like from her point of view. She especially wants men to take note that it’s not simple for gorgeous girls.
“The main issue, I would say, is men viewing me as an object or something to conquer,” she explained.
“When men hit on me, I just know it’s because they want to [sleep with] me, not because they want to actually take me out on a date, so I pay no interest to them.”
Only once or twice has a genuine, kind guy approached her with the intention of taking her out on a date.
It’s not like she’s gone on all terrible dates, she hasn’t. Some have been amazing, but they always lead to the guy wanting something casual, which she’s not about.
She likes to wait to build a physical connection until she feels like she can trust a man and they prove to her they’re not just with her for her looks.
Once she thinks she’s there, she’s always let down. These guys lose their interest in her instantly after they get what they want.
svetograph – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person – pictured above a young woman sits at a cafe table while resting her head on her hand
“I changed my approach a long time ago and decided maybe I should be the one to approach guys I think are cute and interesting since the ones that approach me have only one mission in mind,” she said.
“When we exchange information, we talk a lot, and things go so well, and I feel so happy and accomplished that I had the courage to reach out to start this connection. Then, of course, things happen as they always do – we [sleep together], they lose interest.”
While it’s kind of cool she can waltz into any given bar and get any man she wants at the end of the evening, it comes along with never hearing from them again.
She just wants to find a man who will go shopping for vintage items with her, or cook with her, or hold her in their arms.
It’s been so difficult for her to determine if men like her for her personality instead of her physical attributes that she basically prefers being by herself.
“I spend most of my time alone in my house now,” she continued. “I cook, I read, I watch movies and YouTube videos, I learn languages, and I live my life like an old woman because I can’t handle being used for my body anymore.”
“In the last 4 years I have been single, I can count on one hand how many guys I have been on dates with.”
“When, or if, I’m able to date again, I know that I have to completely be celibate until I know for sure they actually view me as a person and want to make a commitment to me, which is a really horrible thought because [a physical connection] should be something that you do with people you truly value – it’s a bonding mechanism. But I get bonded, and they bounce.”
What do you think about her perspective?
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