Katharina Buczek
I Think We’ve All Been In An “Almost Relationship”
The following column is the opinion and analysis of the writer. I’d argue that practically all of us have been in an “almost relationship.”
I mean that confusing limbo period when you’re definitely not just friends but also aren’t something “more.”
You’re Going Out On Dates, You Constantly Talk…
It’s natural in the progression of romantic endeavors. You go out on dates, text each other often, and possibly even hook up. The only stepping stone left is actually making it official.
…But Nothing Ever Becomes Official
Sadly, though, not everyone makes it out of this in-between phase. Instead, you may find yourself stuck there, yearning for a committed relationship that doesn’t seem to be on the horizon.
What Could Be Holds You Back
When you have rose-colored glasses on, blinded by the “what could be,” it’s easy to ignore the red flags and hold out hope that things will change.
Here Are 4 Signs It’s Time To Give Up Though
However, more often than not, these are the signs that you finally need to give up on your “almost relationship.”
The Effort Is One-Sided
I truly believe that friendship is the best foundation for a strong romantic relationship. I also realize that “almost relationships” aren’t exactly friendships; they’re more complicated, adoring, and interwoven with fuzzy feelings.
Regardless, if you are already feeling the strain in your relationship and recognize that you’re putting in all the effort, what makes you believe that would change once your relationship becomes serious?
If you are the only person who ever reaches out, shows emotional support, or makes sweet gestures, it’s time to cut them loose. Patterns now can foreshadow toxic cycles later, and you deserve more than that.
You’ve Been In Limbo For Too Long
There are plenty of reasons why people wait to make relationships official. It could be emotional, like a fear of commitment, or more practical, like wanting to finish school or succeed at their career first.
But you cannot stand by forever, no matter how much love you have for them. After months or even years of waiting around, your “almost relationship” has lost the momentum to move forward.
Plus, if they still aren’t looking to take the next step with you following so much time, you may need to acknowledge that they never will be.
You’re More Stressed Than Enthusiastic
As I said, the pre-cursor period to becoming official can be a whirlwind of fun and excitement. You’re gallivanting on dates, flirting constantly, and daydreaming about a possible future. Yet, if it goes on too long, this spark can be lost, and the behavior that previously invigorated you can start to downright frustrate you.
The sporadic texts that used to fill you with adrenaline are now signs of inconsistency and apathy. The spontaneity of your relationship that previously thrilled you now seems surface-level in the face of lacking true, genuine connection.
If you are finding yourself discontent, stressed, or even heartbroken over the lack of progression in your “almost relationship,” you need to move on.
You’re Sacrificing The Relationship You Really Want
Finally, if you have always been in pursuit of a serious, committed relationship, don’t sacrifice your dream for someone who isn’t showing up.
Sure, the more casual nature of your interactions may make them happy, but what about you? You shouldn’t have to compromise your own goals and standards to appease someone, even if you love them.
Letting go will be incredibly difficult, and I won’t try to downplay that. Still, in my opinion, remaining in a situation that doesn’t truly fulfill your romantic desires will prove to be even more painful in the long run.
