4 Reasons Being A People Pleaser Can Damage Your Romantic Relationship

Chip Chick |

Nov 18, 2024

Closeup portrait of a young couple sharing a tender moment while enjoying a day outside — Jeff B/peopleimages.com - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual people - pictured above a couple enjoys time outside

Are You A People Pleaser?

vladteodor – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person – pictured above a woman smiles in front of some potted flowers

The following column is the opinion and analysis of the writer. Would you classify yourself as a people pleaser?

It means you are always making the needs of everyone else around you a priority while putting yourself last. Trying so hard to make others happy can absolutely be detrimental to your own life.

It’s Tempting To Be One In Order To Keep Your Romance Going

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Sometimes, it can be really hard to admit that you’re a people pleaser. Regarding romantic relationships, it can be tempting to fall into people pleasing habits in hopes of getting someone to stick around.

You Might Be Trying So Hard To Be Nice

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In order to avoid conflict or prevent problems, many of us focus solely on being nice and nurturing, which could lead to suppressing how we really feel.

But It’s Not Doing You Any Favors

high angle view of happy young couple in sunglasses smiling each other on yacht

LIGHTFIELD STUDIOS – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people – pictured above a couple sails on a boat

Although it’s important to treat your partner with kindness, love, and appreciation, it’s so important to avoid acting like a people pleaser around them so you can protect your peace.

Here Are 4 Ways Being A People Pleaser Can Wreck Your Romance

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If you’re entering a relationship or find yourself in a relationship where you feel like you’re giving more than you’re getting, here are 4 ways being a people pleaser can damage your romantic relationships.

You’re Not Being Authentic

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Krakenimages.com – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person – pictured above a woman laughs while walking down a city sidewalk

Finding love is all about finding someone you can be your true self with. Of course, in the earlier days of a relationship, we are often so focused on making a good impression, and it’s normal not to be completely comfortable yet.

But if the relationship grows and you’re still putting on a “nice” face 24/7, catering more to your partner than you do yourself, that’s not authentic and not how you want to live.

You Can’t Set Boundaries

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If you’re constantly doing things for your partner and giving them everything they want when they want it, you’re not setting personal boundaries.

You’re essentially giving your partner permission to walk all over you whenever they want, which is not okay and can be detrimental to a relationship.

You’re Letting Them Off The Hook

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When you act as a people pleaser in a romantic relationship and constantly tell your partner yes, you’re opening up the door for them to behave however they want.

Always pleasing your partner and asking for nothing in return can give them the impression that they can behave poorly and are off the hook.

You May Grow To Resent Them

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People pleasing often leads to resentment and distrust. It’s a feeling that will slowly build up the more you sacrifice your wants and needs to please your partner until you can’t take it anymore.

Do yourself a favor, and be sure to watch yourself throughout your relationship. Find ways to maintain a balance between what your partner needs and what you need.