Bre Avery Zacharski
Three years ago, when this 29-year-old woman and her 31-year-old boyfriend first started dating, she made it crystal clear to him that her desire was to have children and get married in the future.
He agreed that he wanted those same things, and as time has gone on, she’s expected her boyfriend to come up with a concrete timeline for marriage and kids.
She doesn’t want to have a fancy wedding; she just wants to be able to say that she’s married prior to starting a family of her own.
When talks of taking the next steps first came up, her boyfriend maintained that he had to work on a couple of personal things, so she gave him space for a couple of months.
She then addressed the future with her boyfriend again, insisting she needed to know when he planned on settling down with her so she could determine if the timing was best for her.
Following those initial conversations, she has checked in with her boyfriend time and time again, but he always has an excuse and pretends as if they have never talked about this before.
He will say he just doesn’t think about marriage and kids, or he will say he’s not a good planner. It bothers her that he did say he would commit, but he isn’t following through.
“Last month, we had this talk again, and I finally felt like he had heard me,” she explained. “He said he understood what I was asking for and agreed to “give it some thought in a practical context” over the next few weeks.”
“I felt so sure that he meant what he said that I finally felt peace of mind, and we had the most relaxed and happy month after that. Yesterday, I finally followed up and asked him whether he’d given any thought to the timeline question, and again, he hit me with “I don’t think about these things,” as if he hadn’t specifically agreed to think about it this time.”
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