Chip Chick
This 21-year-old woman has known all her life that she didn’t ever want to have kids. While she didn’t mind being around children, she knew she didn’t want to be a mother. She and her fiancé, 24, have been in a relationship for three years, and she was clear with him from the beginning that she didn’t want to ever become a parent.
Last year, her now-fiancé asked her to marry him, and she accepted his proposal. For the first several months after getting engaged, everything was fantastic. Her fiancé was great and made her so happy.
“However, about six months into the engagement, he kept bringing up the idea of maybe having a baby. I told him every time that I don’t want kids of my own, and he accepted this answer the first few times,” she said.
Her 19-year-old sister gave birth to a daughter at the end of last year. Even though the two of them live eight hours apart, they have a close bond, call each other almost every day, and get together as often as they can. The birth of her niece seems to have triggered something in her boyfriend.
“My fiancé has gone from accepting ‘no’ as my answer to kids to saying how disappointed he is in me for not being maternal like my sister. He constantly makes sly comments and remarks about me ‘hating children’ and how I would be a useless mother. His most recent comment (which he said to my mother) was, ‘When we (him and I) have kids, you’ll have to be the mom if she isn’t going to stick around,'” she explained.
Understandably, this concerned and horrified her, and what was most surprising was that her mother supported his idea, even though she was fully aware that she didn’t want to have children. For the most part, her mother has stood by her choice not to become a mother, expressing that it’s her personal choice.
After her fiancé’s comment, her mother has begun trying to get her to change her mind about children because her sister recently gave birth. At one point, her mother told her that while she understood that she didn’t want to have kids, she needed to consider what her fiancé envisioned for their future as well.
“She said to me, ‘I really hope you change your mind for his sake.’ What? So, I told him that if he was so desperate for a baby, he could have one! Just not with me. I said I would give back the ring, no hard feelings, and we can move on and meet new partners who actually want the same things in life as us. This did not go down well. He shouted, screamed, and smashed up our bedroom,” she shared.
Her fiancé had a complete meltdown when he realized there was the possibility that she would break up with him. He told her that he would be having children and that it would be with her and no one else.
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