“He gave me an itemized list of what he spent his credit cards on, and most of it was, you guessed it, eating at restaurants.”
“Fast food, coffee shops, dine-in, etc. This felt like a slap in the face to me because 1) he racked up all the same debt I gave him money to pay off and expected to stay that way, and 2) he didn’t take my advice and racked it up by eating out.”
While he did pay for her food as well on his credit cards, she had told him that in order to help him stop using his credit cards so often, she would do her part, too, and not eat out as often with him. She doesn’t mind cooking her own meals at home, but her boyfriend has grown accustomed to eating out a lot.
“I believe that he would be able to pay me back in the few months he specified if I loaned him the money, but I am not about to be his personal piggy bank that he can run to when he finds himself buried in debt against his own poor financial choices,” she shared.
“I’m prepared to propose that I will loan him the money on the condition he cancels his credit cards.”
In her view, asking her boyfriend to cancel his credit cards so that he is forced to only use his debit card could help him become more responsible.
This way, he would see the money leaving his bank account, and he’d have to be more careful how much he spends.
Later, she discussed the issue with her boyfriend, and she learned that he had purchased more than he had originally told her when he’d given her the itemized list of all his credit card purchases.
The purchases he had hidden from her were huge expenses, and now she has changed her mind about loaning him money.
She has come to the decision to refuse to loan him any more money, no matter what. She believes that because he is the one who got himself into all this debt, he should be the one to get himself out of it on his own.
She will be sure to still emotionally support him and give him financial advice to help guide him in the right direction.