Here Are 3 Things You Can Use To Confirm That Your Mother Is A Narcissist
There’s nothing more nightmarish than growing up with a narcissistic mother. Mothers are thought of as nurturing, comforting beings. But some are master manipulators that use their children to meet their own needs.
If your mother is more like the latter description, but you’re unsure that she can be classified as an actual narcissist, TikToker Danish Bashir (@narcabusecoach) is going over three things that you can use to confirm that your mother is a narcissist.
Number one: a narcissistic mother acts like an entirely different person in front of others. Around people outside of the family unit, she exudes peace, warmth, love, and light.
As a kid, and even as an adult, it’s a jaw-dropping experience to watch your mother put on such an elaborate act that effectively convinces others that this lovely, kind person is who she really is.
Throughout your childhood, you probably often got comments from people telling you how lucky you are to have such a great mom. When you invite friends over to your house, they might remark on how nice your mom is.
“This behavior traumatizes you as a kid to your core because she is nice and sweet to people but cruel and nasty to you behind closed doors,” said Danish.
As a result, you might find yourself feeling angry, causing you to lash out. And your mother and her friends may wonder why you are so unfriendly and disobedient all the time.
Number two: when anything bad happens to you or anyone she knows, she paints herself as the victim. Instead of being supportive, she makes the entire situation about herself.
In addition, she creates a rift in the family, which forces family members to adopt certain roles. Someone will be put in the position of “golden child,” and someone else will be the scapegoat of the family.
InsideCreativeHouse – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
This works to pit siblings against each other. It’s a narcissistic mother’s way of keeping everyone in their place.
Number three: she frames you and sets you up to put you down. What this means is that a narcissistic mother will demean you or do something she knows will get a reaction out of you.
Then, she can pretend to be a victim when you inevitably reach your wit’s end. Overall, she always wants you to remain a shadow of her so she can get all the attention, care, and concern from everyone, including you.
Unfortunately, several TikTok users could relate to Danish’s description of narcissistic mothers and shared their experiences in the comments section.
“She’ll use your pain on social media to beg for thoughts and prayers for you but not even discuss the issue with you,” commented one user.
“This and the fact that they’re never the bad guy. It’s always everyone else who’s in the wrong, never them. Not to mention the delusions of grandeur,” stated another.
“Yes. The child exists as a second chance at the life they wanted. Also, the kid becomes the pawn, jester, and therapist,” someone else wrote.
@narcabusecoach 3 Things A Narcissistic Mother Does To Traumatize You To Your Core #narcissist #narcissisticmom #narcissisticparents #toxicparent
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