She Refused To Attend Her Friend’s Boyfriend’s Birthday Party After Her Friend Wanted To Approve Her Outfit Beforehand To Ensure She Did Not “Steal The Spotlight”
This 29-year-old woman has a friend named Kate, who is 28. And Kate has been with her 29-year-old boyfriend, Jamie, for about three years.
She and Kate also initially met Jamie together on a night out. So, while Jamie is obviously Kate’s boyfriend, she still considers him to be a friend of hers.
“We share an interest in a particular sport that we text about sometimes, and if I have a spare hospitality ticket to one of the sporting fixtures, I will sometimes invite Jamie to go,” she explained.
Anyway, Jamie’s 30th birthday is right around the corner. So, he and Kate decided to plan a big birthday party– which she helped out with.
Just a few days ago, though, Kate wound up texting her with a bizarre request. Apparently, her friend asked if she wouldn’t mind “toning down” her look for the party. Kate also requested that she send pictures of what she was planning to wear to the event in advance.
Now, she was taken aback and asked Kate several times why she needed to tone herself down. Kate refused to respond, though, asking if she “really had to say it.”
But eventually, she got her friend to answer her questions, and she was shocked by what her friend said.
Apparently, Kate asked her to dress “frumpy” because her friend did not want to get outshone at Jamie’s birthday party.
Then, once she did not immediately reply to Kate’s message, her friend elaborated further. Kate claimed to want Jamie’s full attention and said that would not happen if she showed up “dressed properly.”
New Africa – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
And understandably, she was pretty annoyed by what her friend was implying. So, she wound up telling Kate that if her wardrobe was going to be such a concern, then she would rather just politely decline her party invitation.
Kate did not take that “solution” well, though. Instead, her friend reportedly started freaking out and accusing her of being immature for not going just because she wouldn’t be able to “steal the spotlight.”
That was never why she declined the invitation, though, and tried to explain that to Kate.
“It was about her making me responsible for whether or not I draw her boyfriend’s attention, which is something I’ve never tried to do nor done as far as I’m aware,” she said.
Afterward, it appeared as though Kate tried to backtrack. More specifically, her friend said it was important to Jamie himself that Kate stand out as his girlfriend because his friends and colleagues would be in attendance.
Quite frankly, though, that excuse did not change anything for her. So, she just reiterated how if Kate was so worried about her distracting everyone, then she would rather just not go instead of feeling humiliated.
“I also said I would send her Jamie’s gift, and she could tell him why I wasn’t coming,” she added.
Unfortunately, though, Kate never ended up telling Jamie why she couldn’t be there for his birthday party. So, she actually received a text from Jamie.
In the message, he claimed to know that she was “booked” but said he would really like it if she could attend. Jamie even asked her if she could rearrange her schedule in order to make the event.
Then, before she could even reply to Jamie, she received a different message from Kate. In that text, Kate admitted to knowing that Jamie was texting her, too, and trying to get her to go to the party.
So, Kate asked if she could “just put her pride aside” and show up to the party for Jamie’s sake.
She was not going to attend the celebration if Kate was going to be breathing down her neck, though. So, she asked again if Kate would be able to “ditch the outfit policing.”
Shockingly, though, Kate still said no! And in the end, she wound up just telling her friend that she would not be at the party.
Now, Kate never actually wound up replying to her message. However, it appears that some mutual friends heard about the situation– because she received texts from a few other people.
In the messages, her mutual friends revealed how Katie was aware of how ridiculous her request was. But, they also claimed that Kate was just desperate to be viewed a certain way by other people at the party.
“And even if it’s pathetic, I would probably feel the same way in her shoes,” her mutual friends told her.
But, on the other hand, she also spoke with other friends who did not know Kate. And apparently, they called Kate’s request “nuts” and said she shouldn’t have been required to “bow to the pressure.”
While she did receive the support of her own social circle, though, she is also starting to feel bad about missing Jamie’s party– since he specifically asked her to attend.
So now, she has been left wondering whether refusing to go to the party after Kate wanted to approve her outfit was a jerky thing to do or not.
Do you believe Kate’s request was understandable or totally unfair? Did she have a right to say no to the “outfit policing?” Do you think she should tell Jamie the real reason why she didn’t go to his birthday party or not? If you were in her shoes, what would you do?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
If true crime defines your free time, this is for you: join Chip Chick’s True Crime Tribe
She Was Amelia Earhart’s Flight Instructor, And The First Woman To Have An Aviation Business
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
More About:Relationships