This thirty-one-year-old woman has a friend group that always meets for dinner twice a month.
Between six and eight people go every time, depending on everyone’s schedules, and the entire group gets to take turns picking what restaurant they want to try out.
But, last year, one of her friends, Jen, asked if the group could include another woman named Kate. Kate had just moved to their city and knew Jen from college.
So, Jen thought it would be a nice way for Kate to develop friendships and get a taste of the city while being “the new girl in town.”
And it turned out that Kate was extremely sweet and funny and got along with the entire group amazingly.
Nonetheless, Kate also has a really severe seafood allergy and isn’t just allergic to shellfish or fish, either. Instead, Kate cannot eat any seafood at all, or else she will break out in pretty bad hives.
“This hasn’t really been an issue since we live in the Midwest, and there’s not a lot of specialty seafood restaurants near us. There are a few we tried before Kate moved here, but none of them were worth risking Kate’s allergy to go back to,” she recalled.
But that was until a brand new sushi restaurant just opened up in their town about four months ago.
She and her husband tried it out first and were completely blown away by the food. Then, she and her husband went on a double date at the sushi joint, and they fell in love with the food all over again.
peopleimages.com – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purpose only, not the actual person
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So, when it was finally time for her to decide which restaurant the group went to, she decided to suggest the sushi restaurant.
And a few other women in the group even shared how they had wanted to try it out, too.
Afterward, though, Jen reminded everyone about Kate’s food allergy and asked her if she could pick a different spot for their bi-weekly dinner. And, like a good friend, she did– and the group went to another restaurant.
The following week, though, she decided to ask the other girls if they still wanted to try the sushi restaurant.
The dinner was not a part of the group’s regularly scheduled dinners and only included a few of the girls.
Nonetheless, word of the dinner got out and made its way around the group. So, Jen, Kate, and another woman became extremely upset that everyone else went to dinner without them. Moreover, they accused her of purposefully excluding them.
“But, to me, this is not middle school. We are allowed to do things as friends outside of the full group,” she explained.
“And since Kate has a food allergy, it makes sense that she doesn’t attend a meal like this.”
“We still have our normal scheduled dinners. Just this time, a smaller group went to a restaurant that another friend could not eat at.”
Plus, she added that if she and the other girls really had wanted to exclude Kate, she could have just stood firm on her initial sushi restaurant pick instead of going to another joint.
Nonetheless, Jen and Kate still believe that she seriously crossed a line by going behind their backs and “dividing” the group.
So, now that people are pointing fingers and taking sides, she is not sure if going to the sushi place with just a few of the girls is a rude thing to do or if they are totally overreacting.
Do you think she intentionally tried to exclude Kate? Should people be required to invite the whole friend group every time they hang out? How would you handle this situation?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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