Abby Connolly
Many foster parents are taught not to bad mouth or gossip about their foster child’s biological parents and family members, especially if that child expresses that they miss them.
Unfortunately, some foster parents are so determined to adopt their foster child that they lose sight of that.
One woman recently reported her sister-in-law and her husband to their foster caseworker after they refused to stop bad-mouthing their foster daughter’s mother.
She grew up in the foster care system after being taken away from her mom, who was an addict. Coincidentally, her husband’s sister and her husband were foster parents to a 13-year-old girl named Mae, who is going through the same thing.
“Mae was removed from her mom at the age of 10 and does still have visits with her mom, [as] Mae loves her mom,” she explained.
“This was clear from day one of her moving into my sister-in-law’s house. [My] sister-in-law and her husband were not understanding of Mae [still] loving her mom. They would actively discourage her from wanting more access to her mom. Mae was writing letters to her mom, and they read those. They asked her why she would give up any stable home to go back to a dangerous life.”
Mae eventually told her foster caseworker about this issue, but unfortunately, nothing came out of it, and the caseworker dismissed her concerns.
Unfortunately, even though Mae made it clear how uncomfortable she was, her sister-in-law and her husband continued bad-mouthing her mom. They even did it at family functions, encouraging relatives to join in on the gossip.
“I attempted to explain to my sister-in-law and her husband that they were not helping Mae by disparaging her mom and that many foster kids love and miss and want their parents, and [that] being an addict doesn’t change that,” she recalled.
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